I am a young driven sociopath and my spirit animal is a narwhal. I could self proclaim to be an some sort of artistic creator but I won’t because I really ain’t no alternative version of Renoir, the only thing I can do on paper that I don’t think you can do better is my autograph. I believe I am a Gemini but I really might not be one I just like to tell people I am one when asked. To describe myself I would have to divide myself into 3 personalities …there’s me who says whatever the shit i want without filter, me who is quiet and me who’s forcing a conversation to talk to whomever so that I seem like a normal person that socializes. With this many versions of me. i think it’s normal that I often whisper to myself in a creepy way to sort out all my inner personalities. You might not like me right away but I am competent in doing whatever I want to do and I can promise I’ll grow on you and whom ever you surround me with.
Dear employers that never hired me after the interview stage,
I wondered if I should have given you the above self introduction instead of the so-called typical one you might have heard variations of from the other candidates.
Why the fuck won’t anyone hire me?